


Iruka, I'm gay

by pearky



Category: Naruto
Genre: Coming Out, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Gen, It's Father Son bonding time, M/M, Umino Iruka Adopts Uzumaki Naruto, its been 4 years since i wrote anything okay, not romantic though - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-30 23:35:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20105470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pearky/pseuds/pearky
Summary: Naruto feels things for Sasuke and doesn't know what to do with himself.





	Iruka, I'm gay

Late afternoon glow seeps into the small kitchen where his foster father is washing the dishes. It's a lazy Sunday. The humid weather is suffocating. It settles heavily on his lungs and shoulders and pumps up his anxiety tenfold. The sound of plates and cutlery clashing together seems deafening to him. It's been like this all day. Naruto wonders if Iruka has noticed.

His shoulder leans against the doorway, a hand covers his blushing face. He's silent. Even his breathing is quiet and muffled like he doesn't want to be noticed. Right now, he doesn't. He wishes he could sink into the floor and disappear.

It's a few days after his thirteenth birthday. Iruka has been so nice to him all week, let him throw a little party in the tiny apartment, baked him a cake and got him a present, too. He isn't sure if he wanted to ruin the good mood that's finally settled over the two person household. But he's pretty sure that Iruka is on the same page as him on this and won't judge Naruto. Besides, he doesn't know where he could know more about his issue. He needs validation like a drop of water. 

It's only been a few months since Iruka has adopted him, anyway. Maybe it's too soon? Maybe Iruka only took him in because he feels pity? He sure was miserable back at the orphanage, but he tried not to let it show... 

But then again, Naruto doesn't have anyone to ask about this. Kakashi would laugh at him and tell everyone. And he surely couldn't tell his friends. 

Just suck it up. 

'What's on your mind, Naruto-kun?' Iruka was suddenly in front of him, crouching down a little so his eyes could meet the young boy's. Naruto is taken aback, jumping away from the doorframe. His heartbeat increases rapidly. Is he reading Naruto's mind?

'Oh, Iruka-sensei...' he mutters, running his hand up and through his bright yellow hair. 'Ah, um. It's nothing, you know,' he curses himself for chickening out but now that he's so close and the situation is so real... He won't be able to take the disgust of his only friend. His foster father. His /brother/. 

'I can see that something is bothering you. You can tell me anything!' Iruka's smile calms down Naruto, like every time. Even his eyes are shining. It's always so genuine, so real. Seeing anyone smile like this in the village is such a rare treat. He takes a deep breath before looking back up at Iruka. Now or never.

'I- can we sit down for this? It's just, ah, it's... It's a big thing and I-'

'Of course.' Even though Iruka cuts him off, the words are still comforting. This sense of security, the grounding, this is what Naruto needs right now. The constant reassurance that this was going to be okay. 

They sit down at the kotatsu, Naruto tucking his feet under and enjoying the heat, Iruka next to him. They spend a few moments in silence, which Iruka uses to pull his hair up into a bun on the top of his head. Deep breaths. Naruto decides to grow a pair and begins.

'Iruka-sensei, I... I think I like boys more than I like girls.' He's been preparing for this for so long but still, the shame that falls over him once he says that sentence is unbearable. He immediately wishes that he could just stuff it right back into his mouth. He doesn't even look at Iruka. 'I mean, I mean- it's- no, I must be just young, right? Young boys don't like girls, it's just how things are, right? This is stupid, no, I'm supposed to like girls, but I just don't- I... It's stupid, I shouldn't have-'

'Naruto.' Iruka stops him, a gentle hand appears on his shoulder. 'It's fine.' His tone is reassuring and kind, just like always. Naruto swallows in an uneasy manner. He still doesn't dare look up, his eyes fixed on the tabletop; tears prickle behind his eyelids when he squeezes them shut. His entire face feels hot like he's running a fever. This is so embarrassing. Every girl likes boys. Every boy either hates girls or has a crush on one of them, but no boy has a crush on another. 

His hands squeeze into fists until one of Iruka's hands rests on Naruto's tense fingers. He relaxes.

'It's not stupid. Not at all.' Naruto's eyes finally open, the tears he's been holding back roll down on his face and into his lap. He still doesn't look up at Iruka. 

'But- but... Boys are supposed to like girls, you know? Am I a weirdo?' His voice cracks at the end, almost desperate. He feels stupid for crying. Ninja weren't supposed to cry. 

'No, not at all. Some people like boys more than girls. I do, too,' Naruto's eyes snap up to look at his foster father. He's suspected this, sure, but hearing him say it was so much different. 'It's not something to be ashamed of. You don't need to beat yourself up over it, you're normal!' Iruka's eyes close with the smile he gives Naruto. 

'But, but- you never see two boys hold hands on the street,' He objects, although, admittedly he's relieved beyond belief. He's never felt so understood, so heard. Naruto thinks that this is what it's like to have a family. 

'Well, you see, it's a bit more complicated than that.' Iruka looks down at the small boy, running his calloused hand over the blond locks of hair, hoping to be of comfort to him. He knows how hard it is to feel this way at such a young age, knows how terrible it is to have all these questions and no one to answer them. He feels guilty in a way for having to be the person to tell him how bad society might treat him when he grows up. 'The thing is, people like you and I, we understand that love is powerful. We know that it's not wrong to love someone, but... Some people don't think like that. To a few people, love isn't real if it's between two boys or two girls.' Iruka sighs and rests his hand on Naruto's shoulder again. 

'But that's stupid, you know.' Despite this, Naruto's heart is so much lighter. He feels reassured. The world never accepted him either way - they'll accept him once he's proven himself, and he's sure of that. He'll show them. Into boys or not, everyone will acknowledge him one day. 

'It's stupid, I agree.' Iruka pauses for a second, thinking that Naruto will start rambling, but the young boy stays silent. He continues then. 'You're fine, Naruto. Everything is okay with you. If you only like boys, that's fine. If you like boys and girls, that's fine, too. If you decide you don't like either, that's okay, too. You're not different or bad because of that.' 

Naruto's arms wrap tightly around Iruka's neck. He hugs onto his foster dad like a small child and Iruka holds him. He feels the weight of the situation, how tense his student is, how scared he must've been to admit all of this. He runs his hand up and down Naruto's back in a way he hopes is comforting. 

For a moment, they're silent, Naruto's tears staining Iruka's shirt but still smiling. He's happy. Right now, it feels like everything is going to be okay. Iruka's opinion on him hasn't changed. He still has a home. 

'So, do you like anyone in particular?' Iruka tries to lighten the mood when Naruto pulls back. 

'Hey, who said I like anybody?!' Naruto's blush is a dead giveaway. He crosses his arms and pouts at the other.

'It's fine - everyone's in love with Sasuke.' Iruka teases on, ruffling up Naruto's unruly blond hair. Naruto yells in protest and pushes him away. 

'You're mean, Iruka-sensei! I don't like Sasuke, you know! He's a jerk!' Naruto's protests are a lot harder to believe when he's red as a tomato. 'And besides - your crush on Kakashi-sensei is much more obvious, you know!'

Iruka's face flushes an even darker shade than Naruto's. 'Hey, you don't know anything about that!'

Naruto laughs. He feels light and airy as he usually does, the awkwardness of the moment has passed over. The sun has mostly set, the afternoon glow fading into a a half lidded, lazy evening. The two of them keep talking about unimportant, unrelated things, the chatter light-hearted and playful. At one point, the conversation dies down, a brief flash of silence falling over them. Naruto hears the evening birds singing outside his window and sighs. 

'Iruka-sensei, when did you realise you like boys?'

The question rings in the small room. The birds sing louder. 

'I think I was a bit older than you,' Iruka sighs out, eyes fixed on the clouds outside. 'I had a friend... I felt really close to him. I didn't know that that was what love felt like, I just thought we were really good friends... I never considered the option that I can be in love with a boy. But he kissed me one day, and, well...' Iruka laughs nervously, his hand rested on the back of his neck. 'I lost him... But I learned a lot from him anyway. It was complicated.' 

Naruto's silent for a few seconds. Iruka doesn't think he's ever been this silent, really. 

'When- when I look at Sasuke, I feel so... Understood. It's like we're the same, you know? Even if we're so different. And when we accidentally... Well, that was great. And he stares at me a lot, you know? And when he protected me against Zabuza, that was... You know? That felt great.'

'Yeah. Maybe Sasuke likes boys too, hm?' Iruka flashes a smile at the younger boy. 

'Maybe Kakashi does, too,' Naruto laughs at his foster dad, giddy, his heart full of love. 

He's going to be okay. He's sure of it.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time posting any of my work so I'd love some feedback! Thank you for reading!


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